you never get to know a person if you based your initial reaction with what you see. try making a conversation to open up something inside her mysterious personality. react or not, it's not your lost. you did your part, it's up to her to patch the next move. it's giving an opportunity, waiting for a favorable response, but if she didn't see that, again, atleast you did you part.

oh.. and i want to tell you something.about this potty mouth of mine... i'm beginning to exercise the habit of "........."  i want to ask for an apology with what i said before, please tell father i'm ready to change. i hope he still wants me after all the flaws i made. i hope he still loves me with the sensations i showed them [in affray]..

the nest day i'll be having my next chapter..the chapter of my life. it's my first time to do it and everyone realises how important that is to me. thanks fof the advanced support, i can feel it internally.

about the past days, i've been very callous.. i've been careless.. i've been out of my limit... i've been someone who isn't me... and i admit it all..

but still you came to me, you wore that innocent smiles.. you showered my heart with lightness and gives me peace of mind.. now, i know what to do... thanks for your help and understanding... thanks for wating for me.... thanks for not giving up on me..

i am going to do what is right..i'm going to stick with my responsibilities... i'm going to be that someone i used to be..

that someone who doesn't hurt anyone... that someone who loves everybody...

that someone who used to be with you...

~+~ i'm going to be ME... for YOU ~+~

i'm seating at the backseat when i took cognizance with the woman eating the stale food at the trash..she's carrying a withered flower and a filthy bag. beside her was a little girl, looking at me with disgust. i don't know how to react but her eyes flashed in sudden anger as i pass by.

the next day, i saw the woman again. only now she's with another child. a boy this time, and still she's carrying that withered flower and crooked stick. they were seating on the sidewalk where only a piece of carton gave them the shield from the heat drawn at the cemented road.

the third day, i changed my routine, i planned to walk instead. the part of the road were the woman used to stay in late afternoon was empty..........

the fourth day, i tried to stay at that part of the street..i wore filthy clothes and made my hair dishevelled in horror.. nothing unusual happen..

then after 5 minutes of observing, here comes a policeman, inside i felt a gleeful sensation and thoughts of positive things rushed in my mind..
    maybe the policeman helped the woman.
    maybe they took her and her children and put them in a safer place..
i sighed as a sign of relief maybe after all they’re fine..

then in a split of seconds, the bulgy policeman threw stones at me.
i fainted when i felt blood run down on my forehead..

he was a grievous, devious, barbarian living thing!
curse him. curse that man. maybe that was the same thing he did with that poor old woman..

what if it was you huh?

what if?!

 people never know the suffering of others til they, themselves suffer...!